Jabari Crenshaw, a youth football coach, alleges that a level of selfishness exists in sports that people often avoid discussing, which is rooted in the mindset of “my child should be getting the ball.”
Parents never wanted to get to the bottom of why their child wasn’t starting on offense, but continues to influence the child negatively.
A good youth football coach does more than teach X’s and O’s.
They build character, foster a love for the game, and help shape young people on and off the field. However, a coach must sometimes have a challenging yet crucial conversation with the parents to do the right job.
They work with kids through the medium of a game, and cannot fully help a child if their parent is unintentionally blocking their success.
They have a responsibility to speak up when parents cause mental harm through excessive pressure, constant criticism, or living out their own dreams through their child.
Staying silent costs the child their joy and can create lasting trauma.
It takes a village to raise a child. As long as we continue with the “That’s their child , not mines ” apporch we will watch our community continue to fall deeper into a hole we can’t get out of.
Jabari Crenshaw
A Coach’s Heartbreak: A Child Quits on State Championship Day
Jabari Crenshaw, a mentor and coach, took to social media to share how a star defensive player quit the team just hours before the biggest game of the season.
He calls a toxic culture of parental selfishness in youth sports.
The child’s parents were obsessed with him “getting the ball” on offense.
It’s always been hard trying to mentor through sports because there is a level of selfishness that exists in sports that people don’t like to talk about. And it always stems from the mindset of “my child should be starting” or the “my child should be getting the ball”.
Jabari Crenshaw
Despite their son being a starter on defense and a key player, the parents focused only on his role as a backup on offense.
Crenshaw explained that the child struggled to remember offensive plays and wasn’t as coachable as other players. He believes the father’s negative influence fueled the issues.
Sadly, the child quit on the day of the State Championship, and the coach believes his parents made that decision. He was one of the top pass defenders, and the coach had invested in him for the past four seasons.
The team ultimately lost the championship, and to add to the coach’s heartbreak, the child later posted laughing emojis about the loss.
I’ve spent so much time investing in this child the past 4 seasons. And for the parents to pull a stunt like this or allow it, I needed to speak on it. I’ve let so much slide in the past, but this was the finally straw.
Jabari Crenshaw
Crenshaw’s post has garnered widespread online support, with many parents and coaches thanking him for addressing a common yet often unspoken issue.
He ended his post with a message to be fully upfront with parents from now on, believing that honest communication is essential to protecting children from this kind of pressure.
Speak it louder, Jabari Crenshaw! This is so true, and it’s a damn shame what parents can do to their kids progress in a sport. Quitting is the one thing I can’t stand at this level of play. The worst thing you can have a kid do is quit. Teaches when things get tough….. quit and walk away. Life gonna whoop your ass if that’s how you handle things.
Mark Hansen
In Case You Didn’t Know
- Jabari Crenshaw is originally from Raleigh, North Carolina, and attended Needham B. Broughton High School.
- He married Carlesha Hodges, and they have two children.
